Rather than starting life with a true purpose, there are some lighthouses that could never have fulfilled the role most people expect of them. Falling into this category are the Hoad at Ulverston in Cumbria and the Ammerdown Column at Kilmersdon in Somerset, both of which have been said to be replicas of the Eddystone lighthouse discussed earlier. The seminal influence of Eddystone is evident in the style and proportions of the Hoad (1850) which was designed by Andrew Trimen to commemorate Sir John Barrow. However, the Ammerdown column (1853), built to commemorate Thomas Samuel Joliffe by the architect Joseph Jopling, is less obviously inspired by Smeaton or even Winstanley or Rudyerd. It is columnar in shape, flaring onto a square base with scooped corners but imagine it with its yesteryear ornate glass dome and the similarity to Smeaton’s Eddystone just about shines through. Their inspirations aside, the main claim to the description ‘folly’ made by Ulverston and Ammerdown lighthouses is the fact that they were constructed so far from the sea they never could have aided sailors no matter what strength of telescope the mariners used. This makes them undisputed follies in the eyes of just about everyone.

It is by the water of the Bridgewater Canal but Monton lighthouse is 30 miles from the sea. True the owner / builder intends to top it with a light from a redundant lighthouse but for no beneficial purpose. Hence folly this must be, especially as it has been the cause of many a narrowboat incident with eyes on it rather than the canal since it was built in 2005 at a cost of £20,000.

Also far inland is Derbyshire’s Crich Stand which was built to shine over those counties that supplied the Sherwood Forresters with men and the column was built in 1923 as a memorial to them. With a memorial purpose therefore, Crich is not strictly a folly unless a prerequisite of a lighthouse is to have a nautical function and although that is usual, it is not essential.

These examples show that lighthouses are to be found not only on the coast and another far from the sea is Dunston Pillar. Its purpose was to guide travellers over the desolate Lincolnshire heath and it was built in 1751 by the Hell Fire Club’s Sir Francis Dashwood who owned the nearby Nocton Hall. Then in the early 19th century the 30 feet high lantern that topped the 92 feet tower was replaced with a statue of George III which was removed in World War II as it was thought to be a hazard to the RAF . . . or were the RAF thought to be a hazard to the Pillar as they flew in and out of neighbouring airfields?

Then there are those structures that defy categorisation or rather, fit into too many categories. For example, sat in the lake at Roath Park in the north east suburbs of Cardiff is a building that resembles a lighthouse. However, it boasts a clock plus a memorial plaque to Sir Robert Falcon Scott (father of Peter Scott mentioned earlier) who sailed out of Cardiff for the Antarctic in 1910 on the SS Terra Nova. So there is a horological and memorial purpose but the only shipping it could ever warn if it had a light, are the toy boats sailed on the lake.

Toy Lighthouses

Toy boats deserve toy lighthouses and Teignmouth boasts one of these. It was built of stone in 1845 at a cost of £300 and it is a mere 25 feet high so the range of its light is only 3 miles. Despite its diminutive stature, it does have a purpose and from its siting at the south of the promenade, it guides vessels into the port at the mouth of the River Teign. As such, its function is perhaps not the norm for a lighthouse which usually serves to warn ships away from hazards.

Functional and fun is Teignmouth but it is not a folly and neither is the smallest lighthouse in the British Isles. This is a short distance south along the Devon coast at Berry Head and it was built in 1906, reaching up a mere five metres. To have built it higher would have been folly for it sits on a 60 metres high cliff from where it shines its light over 14 miles.

Both therefore are certainly curiosities and are far from being classified as the norm but serious purposes have they both.

Then there are those with less serious purposes such as were seen at Earls Court in 1907 and at Blackpool two years later. These were Helter Skelters that were given an extra dimension by making them look like lighthouses. Be that as it may, these were structures for entertainment with no marine purpose, be they on the North West coast or in London.

Spiritual Lighthouses

The lighthouse tomb at Drummore could fall under the Toy classification too. However it has to be concluded that its raison d’être is a guide to the world that lies beyond.

In a similar vein is a gas-fired, granite lighthouse in Ulverston cemetery. It is a memorial to Dr Thomas Watkins Wilson, placed there by his daughter. It has waves at its rocky base so it is not directly inspired by the landlocked Hoad that looks down on it.

Back to full scale and there is a lighthouse in Walthamstow of all inappropriate places. In such a location, obviously it has no nautical function and although inland, it was constructed in 1893 with a purpose more specific than would allow inclusion in the Land category. It was built to practically demonstrate the words of Jesus when he said “I am the light of the world”. Standing instead of a spire, this lighthouse is part of today’s United Methodist Free Church so its divine purpose is undeniable and therefore it should not be considered a folly. However, Headley and Meulenkamp do include a number of churches with eccentricities (such as Morwenstow) in their folly bible so maybe Walthamstow is justifiably in there too.

Misnomer Lighthouses

The final category is for lighthouses that are not. Better understanding of this comes with consideration of a building at Bryan’s Ground near Presteigne. It is a two storey brick building with an external staircase and a pitched tile roof. This sounds nothing like any other lighthouse and this should be no surprise when it is explained that its function prior to the installation of electricity in the 1930s was to provide gas to light the house. Ever since, the building has been known as the Lighthouse.

In another example that was opened by the Queen in 1982 there is a definite purpose so it is not a folly but it’s purpose is not that of a regular lighthouse. This is the concrete 418 feet high Express Lifts test tower which is a Grade II listed building. Its inclusion here is courtesy of Terry Wogan who called it the Northampton Lighthouse on his radio programme. Although its lights have a function in that they warn aircraft of the presence of the imposing structure, it is no more a lighthouse than any skyscraper.